CRZY State (wordpress repost)

Standing in a room all alone

yet I’m surrounded by spirits

The silence is turned up,

ironic how I can’t hear it.

I’m forced to face the ugly sides of myself

Distorted and contorted, some faces of fear

maybe I would be more at ease if it were amusement…

but there are no funhouse mirrors;

Everything I see is real here.

I feel a brawl on the horizon brewing

I’m not yet ready to battle my demons…

I see Faces of Death leaning against the wall,

smirks for smiles, acting like they knew.

Envy rocking a green replication,

hating like he’s known to do…

Defiance got his arms crossed,

sneering, refusing to budge…

Selfishness has it’s back turned, concerned about no one…

Typical shit.

Selfless is tapping him on the shoulder,

trying to lend a helping hand…

Arrogance is on some decked out shit…as far as spirits go.

In here looking like a magic cloud, silver lining to his shadow.

But that fool is a midget…baby joker don’t worry me

Self-doubt though?

On some Giant shit that could get me Plaxico Buried.

It gets me every time…aim lower…

I always shoot myself in the foot with worry.

I need to control these demons…but don’t know where to attack…



Fuck it, selfishness gets it first as I remind him how I do for others

He starts to shrink, and I start to feel better before I feel worse…

look over at Selfless, and see his heart is getting too big for his chest…

I give so much sometimes, the shit hurts…I gotta find balance…

Clutching my chest, I turn towards Envy…this shit should be easy…

I’ve got no reason to be jealous of another motherfucker,

because even with my DNA they couldn’t replicate me.

Envy falls flat, but guess who’s getting fat?

Arrogance beats his chest, and Selfishness perk up a bit…

Shit.

I focus in on Self-Doubt, easily the toughest

I declare this world mine for the taking,

I can do anything.

I’m too talented to fail, too Rasheed to not succeed…

we’re Common in species only…that’s where it ends.

Self-Doubt quivers, but Arrogance is peaking…

telling the rest how he’s the shit…figuratively speaking.

I point out flaws in my character, chinks in my armor

acne, only 5′10″, one ear smaller than the other…

not the buffest guy around, don’t make the most change

I drive a Chevy Malibu; stop acting like it’s a Range

Got a bad case of Depression- in fact, I’m surprised he’s not here

probably sitting somewhere in a corner with the light off,

relishing in the darkness of his own sadness…

but anyway, got a case of Depression that leads to Isolation…

how the fuck you walking around here like you’re perfect?

Arrogance sat down…seemingly defeated…

Defiance was still standing, arms folded…a little bit shorter.

I realize that I cannot do everything on my own…

I understand that bull-headedness will only lead me to a Matador

I’ll be thoughtlessly chasing red capes for the rest of my existence.

A one man gang is sure to fall when it comes to team ball…

Defiance drops his arms and comes out of his stance,

and when I turn around, I’m met by Self-Doubt…big as a house.

What the fuck? I’ll be battling these demons for the rest of my life,

it seems I need one to keep the other in check like Congress and Senate…

Guns and Butter shit…Angel/Devil shit…Peace and War…

shit might drive me crazy or put me into an early grave.

Remembering the last two, I look over to the Faces of Death…

same smirks on their faces…they already knew.